How Cockiness Almost Killed Me

I live in Pennsylvania. It's very green and can be lovely.  Generally speaking, I can run outside throughout the year [which I prefer to the monotony of a treadmill. hello, i'm not a hamster.] I'm a visual learner and so I'll assume that you are, too. 

This is me running under normal conditions: 

I'm happy. Life is good. You might even say I've reached inner peace. This is the only time during the day that I am laser-focused. I am not proud of this fact. 

You may recall that I drove Sister to Texas. I don't believe I mentioned why. Our parents, Big L and Baahb, live in the great state of Texas. I knew that I would be visiting with them for two weeks, which means I had to pack my running paraphernalia for the safety and well-being of society. You may not know this about me, but I become a man-eating/rabid dino-bear, devoid of all emotions except aggression and prone to irrational behavior, when I can't run. Don't ask me to explain why. I think the mania that is my brain, which I liken to a small man running around to different filing cabinets in total panic, requires the daily laser-focus that running provides me. Ask Husband if you don't believe me. I realize that not everyone can fully appreciate how important running is to my sanity. I also realize that you might not know what a dino-bear looks like. Please see below for explanations to both.

I digress. 

Everyone on EARTH said these exact words to me: "Texas in JULY?!?! It's going to be SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOT!!!" 

Thanks for that. I wasn't aware that it was summer and that I haven't stopped sweating since May. I also wasn't aware that Texas was DIRECTLY above Mexico, and more importantly, closer to the equator than Pennsylvania. Thank you, kind sirs, for sharing your bottomless wealth of geographical knowledge. I will kill you.

Fast-forward to Texas. I'm lacing up my shoes, guzzling some water. I shrugged off what I considered to be an obvious exaggeration of the heat factor in Texas. Huge mistake.

I fully admit that I got a little cocky when I first stepped out of my parents' home and felt the heat on my skin. I thought, "It's almost 8pm, the sun's going down. No big deal." I'll never lie to myself like that again.

I am telling you the truth when I say that no matter what time of day, if the sun is anywhere near the sky, you will die. You cannot run between the hours of 6am and 9pm. If you think you're made of sturdier stock than I, be warned. Cockiness = Fiery Death/Inferno/Immediate Dehydration.

Out of concern for my readers, I have provided a completely factual illustration:

It is not an exaggeration, and now you know how cockiness almost killed me. 

Things I learned while in Texas:

-I do not enjoy running while fully engulfed in flames.

-You cannot leave the house without sunscreen. I don't care if you're walking to the mailbox. Your skin will melt.